I remember , I was told once by someone I loved. Love is like sand in your hands. The harder you hold it , the more it will force it's way out. Try holding it lightly. It'll stay there.

How true it is. Maybe here's where I shall just learn to let loose and not care what you're doing.

Jealousy is an extremely trivial thing to be upset over. But jealousy is the emotion that upsets me the most. Simple little things can make me jealous. And i guess its because of this that im seen as unreasonable at times? So i decided i shall just keep my mouth shut, and not tell anyone at all. I would just have a blacker than usual face. Thats all. I may appear nonchalant at times but please bear in mind that im actually bothered by it. It means i care, and maybe, a tad too much.

Though I know with my current mood now , I shouldn't be posting this kind of happy posts , I guess it's the only other time where I'm free to. Sleep => Play =>Work => Sleep. 1 complete cycle.

Hectic studying for the past week. Trying to cram whatever others have taken almost 6 months to learn in a few days / a week. Studying till almost 1am everyday , not only kills brain cells. But also makes you fat and poor. Why , you ask. It makes you poor by making you go to 7-11 everytime before you start studying , get a drink (yoghurt) , pocky (strawberry) and other snacks. That's just the starting. We haven't gone to the part where we all start to get stressed out and buy ice-cream.
*Imagine sitting at a table , eating and killing your braincells. Healthy ? NO.*

Though it isn't a totally healthy activity , I still had fun.

*Will continue another time. Just realised something*

I hate to hear that chee bye name.

It's just another night where I'm feeling so fucked up over the incidents that have happened this whole day.

A night that is seeming so long. Another one of those emo periods where I'm feeling lousy over myself. Something that I presumebly can't explain.

And how I wish so much . You could be here in this cold , lonely night. I miss you baby.

Maybe I shouldn't have fell sick. Maybe I should have just died. Some kind of sick joke God is playing. Oh. But I never believed in God. I believed in myself. Well , perhaps it's my own joke. I caused everything to fuck up on me.

How sweet of me.

I feel the inevitable coming . Approaching me ever so quietly and at such a rapid pace. I don't seem to be the one who's able to make you smile after a long tiring day now.I used to be the one but now everything is different. And infact , the long and tiring day would be me. Haven't I already shown enough appreciation ?

The words you said , all pierced through that glass heart causing it to shatter. Would you even care ? Maybe you would. You've got your revenged afterall.

And now ? You don't feel like talking to me. With a post FULL of SACARSM and HURTING words , you're making me think , where our relationship is heading to.

I'm sorry I kept doubting you. Now that the everything is out , I love you so much more.

And to my friends who are reading this , I just want you guys to know , whatever you've heard , I do NOT make friends with a motive behind. Choose to believe me or not.

And then I start feeling so cheated. While I was running about Singapore getting stuffs for you , you were there. Without intention of telling me anything.

And was I so wrong to hold you to your words ? So unreasonable of me ? I'm sorry. I can't help but feel this way. It'll be over soon.

The feeling of the heart breaking , is just unbearable. Stab me